I am finding that most of the texts I read about mindfulness pitch it to users as ultimately resulting in enlightenment, but we as humans are skeptical about religions promising great success. What I am beginning to understand is why they say not to pursue it. Pursuing it makes it an thought or idea for the brain. It makes it a human goal to attain rather than a mindful living. That is why pursuit kills the hope of enlightenment that really shouldn’t exist in the first place.

The message is to just be, but unfortunately that is impossible to “understand”, because when  we try to understand it is impossible to be. Its funny how it all starts to seep in or should I say become apparent as you progress on the path to nothing.

Those perplexing silly things that teachers say have a point, but you can’t express the point. So, the key is to observe the thoughts. Slow them via observation and not via thought. I am slowly seeing it permeate all of my thought processes. I still get angry and resentful and annoyed, but often its with myself. Neither is a good thing, but the fact that I do see it makes it all the more worth it to be “practicing”.

Practicing is just what we say it is. It means being being. Trying to be. Seeing and sensing presence and riding it.

I know. I know. Its all vague and silly sounding, but if you just stay with the fundamentals of knowing, being, and seeing that get repeated to you by one teacher after another, then you will start to “see”. I am just now starting to see more and its quite the relief.

Competition amongst egos seems to be at the core of everything we do as humans, but just a simple reflection on what that reaps, should be enough for any soul to resist, but instead we believe that the death of our ego is inherent in losing ANY competition and on we go fighting to win win win. This is especially true in our silly country where everyone is taught that success only comes through competitiveness.

I saw this vividly recently when my 3 year old was playing soccer. It was wonderful to see that he had learned to be gentle and loving and that his exposure to other kids had not reduced that, but we also wanted him to succeed at the competition in soccer and that meant being aggressive, which he wasn’t inclined to do. When we released his compassion “bonds”, we created a beast and were scared of what we saw, so we had to step back and reflect on the fact that life can’t be a competition, because ultimately there are no winners or losers in life. none.

So, how do we stay mindful of this inherent need to compete in order to save ourselves. I do it with the simple mantra “life is not a competition”, “nobody wins”. Remembering this reminds me that my egotistical thoughts of winning are manufactured and not mindful and it brings me back to mindfulness and presence upon my thoughts.